Spent a great weekend with family. My brother and his brand new wife came in for Father’s day. It was so great to spend time with them and my kids love their uncle and aunt. Coincidentally, today in the mail, I got a new book for supporting a ministry my husband and I really like. The book is called 21 Days to a Great Marriage. Now I haven’t read this book and I really respect the authors so in no way am I saying it isn’t a great book, but we began discussing the prospect of 21 days to a great marriage.
My husband wisely said, “Chapter 5 is Grow out of Your Immaturity…21 days, that can take a lifetime.” Isn’t that true? Marriage is freakin’ hard. My favorite is chapter 4: Set Self Aside. 21 days, seriously, on my deathbed I won’t have this mastered. We (and by we I mean all humans) are so inherently self focused. I believe that is why marriage is so hard.
Don’t misunderstand me, I love the 21 day approach. I think constantly being aware of what is going on in you marriage and constantly working to better it is so important. My husband and I have the great honor of teaching marriage preparation at our church and it helps keep us accountable. It is pretty hard to stand up in front of a bunch of people talking about how to make a marriage great and not be reminded of the areas you need to work on.
When we first got married people were always coming up to us asking how we liked marriage. My husband had the best response, ” Harder than I ever thought, but better than I ever imagined.” 6 years in…in some ways it is easier, but with kids added into the mix in a lot of ways it is even harder. Yet everyday, it is even more worth it to put in the work to make it good.
By the way- congrats to my little bro and his new wife. Welcome to our crazy family! We all couldn’t be happier with the addition.