The Diaper Diaries

but hopefully not full of crap

Make Me Laugh Monday- It’s Business Time March 30, 2008

Filed under: Make Me Laugh Monday,The Challenge — thediaperdiaries @ 8:48 pm

¬†So I have been reading Absolutely Bananas for a while now and while she often makes me laugh, her new “Make Me Laugh Monday” has been upping the ante. I don’t know how often I will participate, but I couldn’t resist this one week.

All of my loyal readers know all about The Challenge (if you are coming for MMLM, go check it out). Well, it now has a theme song.

(it’s not really You Tube week, I will do my own content again tomorrow ūüôā

 

She Obviously Hasn’t Been Around a Nursing Woman March 29, 2008

Filed under: Motherhood,Quotes — thediaperdiaries @ 8:36 pm

airport.jpg¬†I saw this story on the news last night and just felt¬†the need to¬†share it¬†with the world (or the 3 of you who read my blog). As a cautionary tale if you will. I particularly love Gloria Allred’s (seriously this woman will take any and every “offended woman” case) quote at the end. How she said that with a straight face, I will never know.

 

What they never tell you March 28, 2008

Filed under: Motherhood — thediaperdiaries @ 9:41 pm

pregnant.jpg¬†I am surrounded by pregnant people. Seriously, they are everywhere. Between my Mom’s club group and MOPS, there is almost a new announcement weekly. Is there something in the water. My friend¬†recently announced on her blog that she is expecting and is looking for only the positive stories of pregnancy and child birth. She should seriously stay away from any woman who has ever given birth cause don’t we just love to tell our pregnancy and birth horror stories. I am not really sure why that is, but I find it to be universal in groups of mommies no matter how well I know them.

So Heather, avert your eyes

  1. I got heartburn like crazy. My biggest pregnancy craving, Mexican food. How horribly unfair is that?? You know what I learned though? Ice cream really helps with heartburn. Preferably ice cream from Dairy Queen with chunks of Reese’s Peanut Butter cups in it. Hmmm, this could be why I get the size of a house when I am preggo.
  2. You know how they say that when you get pregnant your hair will get thicker and maybe even change texture. Like curly will become straight, or straight curly. My hair actually thickened with each pregnancy and has stayed a bit thicker. Which is a sad testimony to just how thin my hair was before I had kids. What they don’t tell you is that you get hairy in other weirder places. Me, I got a hairy belly. Which went nicely with the stretch marks.
  3. My feet have grown a whole half size since having kids. This really stunk with Lily who is a fall baby because the feet growth was accompanied majorly swollen ankles that summer. My goodness do I sound sexy! Thank God for flip flops. Now I kind of have one foot that is a 6 1/2 and one that is a 7. Lovely.
  4. You know how towards the end of your pregnancy, well meaning, lovely people keep saying “Sleep now, cause once the baby comes….” Yeah, you stop sleeping well about month 7. Between the constant need to pee in the night and the complete inability to get comfortable and the constant fear you might roll over onto your back therefore cutting off all blood supply to your lower half and paralyzing you for life…and the fact that your hubby has STOLEN your body pillow, sleep isn’t really happening.
  5. You know that scene in City Slickers when Billy Crystal is helping to birth Norman and he loses his watch. Yeah, that happens at the doctor several times in the weeks leading up to birth. There ain’t no epidural for that. Then that unpleasantness is quickly replaced by elation when she tells you that you are beginning to dialate and efface. You go home and tell your hubby to be in constant contact cause this baby could come any second. Weeks later, you realize your doctor is just messing with you so they have something to laugh about with the other OBs. Those numbers don’t mean jack.
  6. You pay pee your pants a little…that might never get better.
  7. The big boobs…oh wait that part is awesome. Except they are dwarfed by your gigantic belly and they soon will resemble a deflated balloon. So, not so awesome after all.

You know what else they don’t tell you? That you will love that baby sooo much that you will forget all of it the second she is in your arms. And that you will possibly even want to do it all over again.

This post is for a contest going on right now over at the Parent Bloggers Network. They are partnering with Discovery Health¬†to promote “Deliver Me” a new docu-drama on the Discovery Health Channel. Head over there for info on how to enter.

 

Frugal Fridays- Pay In Full March 27, 2008

Filed under: Frugal Fridays — thediaperdiaries @ 9:20 pm

frugal-friday-2-736462.png¬†So I did it. I signed Lily up for kindergarten next year and wrote the enrollment check. We are doing Christian school next year which will require some financial sacrifice, but we are so thrilled with the school, we are all about doing whatever we need to to make this our school home. So I am sure from now until August you will hear me freaking out about this. Actually, not the money, but that my little baby girl is going to kindergarten. Yes, there will be crying and clinging and freaking out. Me, not her. She will be like “See Ya!!” I will be in a heap.

So anyway, I noticed when I was looking over the enrollment info that there is a discount if you pay the whole year upfront by July 1. It isn’t a huge discount, but I am never one to turn down a discount if at all possible. So we will be paying upfront to keep a small amount of the tuition to ourselves. This got me to thinkin. One time I had a medical bill that was quite large. I am pretty sure there was some painful pushing out a child involved. Anyway, when I called to set up a payment plan, the woman told me if I wanted to pay the whole bill upfront, there would be a 20% discount on my amount owed. Bingo! Done and done.

So if you are staring at a large sum of money you owe on a bill, it never hurts to ask if they will reduce the bill if you pay it all in full upfront. I am pretty confident this won’t work on a bill that earns interest cause let’s be honest, they want that interest to accumulate, but I guess you could always ask. The worst they can say is no and you look like an absolute fool ūüôā

Has this ever worked for you? I am curious to know what kind of bills this works for so I can get put my haggling skills to work. My skills are a little rusty from a winter without garage sales, but the church rummage sale season starts tomorrow so you can bet I will be back in shape soon. That and in line when the clock strikes 9. I am getting a little butterfly in my tummy just thinking about it. Perhaps I need a little more excitement in my life?

For more frugal tips, head over here.

 

Things I Love Thursday- Arbonne Skin Care March 26, 2008

Filed under: Things I Love Thursdays — thediaperdiaries @ 10:03 pm

arbonne.jpg A friend of mine who is also an independent Arbonne consultant recently asked me to review some products from their skincare line. I was all to happy to oblige. Cause I have been dealing with some breakouts lately. Like I am 13 again. What is up with that???? Well, I am happy to report that thanks to Arbonne, they are almost completely gone (I am not going to lie, I have some pesky hold outs).

Arbonne’s¬†products are developed in Switzerland, made with natural ingredients, never tested on animals and formulated without any animal products or by-products. Their products also don’t contain mineral oil, dyes or chemical fragrances. I also can report that they smell good despite the fact they don’t add chemical fragrances. I was given the NutriMinC¬ģ RE9¬ģ line to try. It is their anti-aging line so I fully expect after I few more months of use I will look 13 again, minus the zits.

Now, I am not going to lie, these products are pricey. Not too bad, just like higher end department store lines. But the upside is they are really concentrated so you don’t need very much each use. Which means, if you do it right, you should be able to make these last a long time. Also if you want to become a consultant yourself, you can get all the products at a discount. You can get your own account for $29 for the first year and $15 each year after that. You can work it just like a Costco membership.

Which brings me to my next point. Arbonne isn’t sold in stores. It is sold by independent consultants. You can be very successful selling for extra income as a stay at home mom if you are interested. My understanding is that it doesn’t take a lot of time and you can make decent money. If you are interested in either the products or being a¬†consultant¬†I would love it if you contacted my friend Adorawho was kind enough to hook me up with the samples. I hear that if you sell enough you get a white Mercedes which beats a pink Cadillac anyday (and buy that I mean no offense to you lovely Mary Kay sales ladies, I love my Mary Kay lipgloss).

 

Works For Me Wednesday- Helpin’ Your Baby Poop March 25, 2008

Filed under: Works for me Wednesdays — thediaperdiaries @ 10:09 pm

worksformewednesday.jpg¬†Ok, I need to start by saying (although this has nothing to do with anything) that there is nothing more depressing than watching American Idol on “Sing a song from the year you were born” night. Seriously, 1990 David Archuleta??!!!! It is ruining a perfectly good night in which I got carded while out with some girlfriends (I could have kissed her). I went from feeling young and sassy to ridiculously old within a few hours. Seriously “Total Eclipse of the Heart” from the year you were born????!!!!!!!

Alright, I feel better getting that off my chest. On to WFMW.¬†So because of Hannah’s yucky illness, she hasn’t been eating or drinking like normal. Typically my kids are really good poopers. Like daily, you can set a clock by them. So I always know something is off when they miss a day. Hannah was crying and clinging this afternoon and pointing to her diaper and then holding her nose. My wizard-like mommy skills detected that she was constipated (Seriously, when will this kid start talking?).

I knew movement was the best thing to get things moving, but she wouldn’t upwrap herself from me to move around. We had no juice in the house and I didn’t think it would work fast enough anyway. So I laid her down on the floor, massaged her tummy and bicycled her legs. She quieted down and even began laughing a bit. Sure enough within the half hour, BULLSEYE. I will spare you the details, but let’s just say, it was quite obvious while she was cranky. Quite obvious. Moving on…

Actually, not moving on. I really have nothing else to say. Bicycling legs…helps a baby poop. ‘Nough said.

For more helpful tips, head over to Rocks In My Dryer.

 

Second Verse Same as the First March 24, 2008

Filed under: Family,Quotes — thediaperdiaries @ 9:11 pm

sick.jpg¬†Hannah is sick again. She started acting weird yesterday afternoon and soon she was sporting flushed cheeks and a warm forehead. Then while the hubby and I were catching up on a DVR’d Survivor, we started to hear odd noises through the monitor (how did people parent before these things were invented?). By the time midnight rolled around her fever was 102 and she threw up. We changed sheets and clothes, gave her some Motrin and hoped for the best. Needless to say, it was a really long night.

And then today…was a really long day. There is something really sweet about having a sick kid. They get really cuddly and curl up with you on the couch and fall asleep on your chest. Then there is the not so sweet. The whining, the clinging, did I mention the whining. That bad thing about having a sick kid (besides the constant fear that you will catch whatever they have) is that your other kid gets totally neglected.

Lily spent the day watching too much TV, begging mommy to please play with her and trying to stay out my “way too short on sleep” path. At the end of the day, when the hubby got home to give me some relief, I pulled Lily over and snuggled her a bit (probably infecting her in the process).

“Mommy is really sorry I didn’t get to pay you much attention today.”

“That’s OK Mommy, I paid attention to myself.”